My Big Little Guy – by Robin Gorman Newman

Red Rock Canyon, Nevada

Seth is growing up in a flash before my teary eyes.

Second grade will soon come to an end, and this week, parents were invited into this classroom to watch a year-end slide compilation created by Seth’s teacher. It was so immensely touching and well done…from the choice of heartfelt music to the overall presentation. Songs from the Little Mermaid and Beaches had me all choked up. I didn’t expect it. But, what struck me the most from the experience was the fullness of my son’s life when I’m not with him. As I strive to be a stimulated (if not overwhelmed) stay at home working, multi-tasking mom, jumping back in forth between personal/family and professional pursuits, my son is creating a life of his own.

He has friends he plays with. Teachers who engage him. Bus drivers who transport him. Experiences that enrich him. And, he’s only 8. There is so much more to come.

While I was aware of the special in-school ceremonies, occasions and outside field trips to places like the local firehouse, police station and children’s hospital, I was truly taken by the rich array of activities, and the fact that from day to day, he is occupied filling his young mind with the vastness of the world. His school is wonderful, and we are hugely fortunate to have such good public education available to us. That was definitely a consideration when deciding where to live, knowing our goal was to one day have a family.

As Seth continues to mature, he will have more ‘n more adventures and experiences outside the home, with and without us….both good ‘n bad.

He’ll meet kids and adults he likes and doesn’t like (he’s already encountered what he calls “the bully girls” during recess), and will learn to navigate the complex world of relationships.

He’ll learn about romantic love. He has had a “girlfriend” since kindergarten, and one day, he’ll have a serious girlfriend and even have sex. It’s hard me me to wrap my brain around that notion, as I help dress him each morning for school, and he gets a kick out of giving me glimpses of his buff little butt….which will no doubt become the object of desire of women when he’s grown.

He’ll establish priorities. He already knows what is important to him and how he likes to help others, whether it’s assisting the lifeguards at our community pool or standing up for other kids (as one mom told me at his class this week), who are having a hard time for whatever reason.

He’ll ultimately decide his profession of choice. At this point in time, if you were to ask, he’d state emphatically fireman, followed by FBI agent, SWAT team member, etc.

He’ll one day have a dog. On an almost daily basis, he asks my husband and I if we’ll ever get a dog. He adores animals in general, and since he also loves police, he’d welcome a German Shepherd, which he would raise as if it’s a member of the K-9 force. But, Marc and I have no plans to get a dog…..we currently have a cockatiel, and that’s enough in our book.

I could go on ‘n on about all that life potentially holds for him, but for now, I’m grateful to still be able to hold his 50 lb. trim body in my arms and on my lap, and that he still likes to cuddle and craves my good night kisses and hugs. No matter how old he is, I will never stop taking pleasure in that, and I hope one day, he’ll return my hugs with a huge muscular bear hug when he’s a man, and I’m an old woman, looking back on the years well spent helping to create the fine human being that Seth has turned out to be.

Robin Gorman Newman is the founder of http://www.MotherhoodLater.com, a worldwide organization for those parenting later in life. She blogs on Fridays on the site and heads the NY in-person chapter of moms age 35+. Motherhood Later…Than Sooner has been featured in USA TODAY, NY TIMES, REAL SIMPLE FAMILY, HEALTH, NPR, etc.  Robin is also the author of How to Meet a Mensch in NY and How to Marry a Mensch, and has been featured as a relationship “guru” on The Today Show, CNN, and beyond.  She is currently adapting the material from her books for the stage.

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